By Polina Pallieraki,
(It is a message of support, encouragement, understanding, and love to all those parents who give their own soul deposit every day in order to raise special and unique children with special needs).
Dear Parents,
The role of a parent was not, and will never be, an easy task. Responsibilities, obligations, needs, stress, and fatigue are constantly present to remind you how important your part as a parent is in this life, from the moment your child is born. But, the joys and happiness of having a child come to alleviate this harsh aspect of a parent’s role. Your role is disparate. It differs substantially, spiritually, and practically. We are not here to remind you of the difficulties, but to apprise you that you are worthy of admiration.
The parent is always responsible for the maintenance and development -mental, spiritual, and physical- of the child. But, you are doing a great job. You prove that no obstacle can deprive you of the love and care for your blood. You raise people who are unique, kind, and naturally good-natured, without a trace of evil. Evil abounds in our society, so we do not need it anymore.
We understand the dark side of your role. We understand your fatigue and resentment that can occur frequently. We understand the pressure. But we also understand that you stand like arrogant rocks, ready to repel any disgusting and disadvantaged comment of this society that finds it difficult to perceive diversity.
The difficulties are many for you and your children. We all know this well. No institution supports your children adequately. No social welfare stands worthy in front of your work. It is there just to exist. You are the ones who fight with your own means, with your own power to offer them everything that should be taken for granted. But the reward is the happiness and progress of your children. You fight for them and you think about them all the time.
We understand that sometimes the situation may not endure anymore. How your thinking darkens and you ponder pessimistically about the future. But it should not. Patience is a virtue. Every situation contains its difficulties, but with tolerance and endurance, everything will find its way. You are equipped with endurance from the very first day. This bearing you may feel that one day it will end, it will cease to exist. But let us be realists — it never terminates. It never ends, as the attachment and concern for your “unique” child is there to silently remind you of everything you require to do.
We would also like to give you a piece of advice, if we are allowed:
Never let anyone degrade, insult, or abuse your child. Unfortunately, times have not changed, although we would like to. Criticism of people with any form of disability is common, though it should not be. People with such a trait are often mentally weak in responding to or avoiding a difficult situation with bitter comments. You are the ones who need to handle this situation properly. Do not hide behind your children’s weaknesses. Go out and demand —the given— respect. Tolerance does not help your children in any way. Your support will make them powerful.
Assist your children as much as you can. The beginning is made by accepting any kind of difficulty. By hiding trouble that your child has, you are simply fostering that difficulty that will only get worse. If, on the other hand, you stand by your children early on and push them to a specialist who knows how to advise you both, things will go smoothly and any difficulty will be alleviated.
All children need love. But yours needs a little more love. Do not evaluate them, accept them as they are.
We are not here to judge you. We always speak as an outside spectator who strongly supports the potential and strength of all these children. We applaud you for all your persistent effort! Diversity will one day be crowned a winner.
Finally, we would like to point out, since a few days ago —December 3rd— was World Disability Day, that all people are equal, have the same rights, and should have equal opportunities. No human being is inferior to another. In conclusion, it needs to be said that the strongest and luckiest people should help the least powerful, fortunate, or healthy since we all have a right to a superior future.
With love and all due respect,
A person who will always be next to people with disabilities.
References
- Σφυρή Πολυξένη, «Η αποτελεσματική αντιμετώπιση του παιδιού με ειδικές εκπαιδευτικές ανάγκες στο συμπεριληπτικό σχολείο της νέας εποχής είναι συνάρτηση, μεταξύ άλλων, της ποιότητας του κλινικού του προφίλ για την απεικόνιση του οποίου οι συναφείς παρατηρήσεις του εκπαιδευτικού στη σχολική τάξη θεωρούνται σημαντικές και πρέπει να προσμετρούνται από τον θεσμικό διαγνωστικό φορέα», Λευκωσία, 2018, Available here
